It always looked so good
by Redallover
Summary: The Uchiha clan was never killed off and Itachi never became evil. Without revenge to drive him on Sasuke’s progress isn’t nearly as far. Even with his parents alive, things still aren't as happy as you'd think. AU SasuNaru NaruSasu
1. Chapter1

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto… I own Gaara! hides from Japanese lawyers who are pulling out their pretty black guns Fine! I don't own anything okay! Oh yeah I don't own the song either. It's done by Smile Empty Soul. Great band if I do say so myself.

Warnings: AU. Child abuse. OOC? Hints of shonen-ai so if you don't like it don't read it! A not happy Sasuke family, so if you want them to be happy get lost! Angst! You have been warned so don't flame.

OKAY! This fic is angst because I just love angst. Not an oneshot! They're probably around 11 years old about now, but you can do whatever in your little heads at the moment. There will be shonen-ai (boy love) soon so be patient all you shonen-ai lovers. In this one Itachi didn't massacre the Uchiha clan and several other things involving Sasu are different, thus it's an AU. There are too many 'poor Naruto' fics and not enough 'poor Sasuke' fics. Thus this was created! Be nice and R&R

**It always looked so good.**

_-I walk into the room_

_you don't have to scream I can hear you_

_bad trip, the needle sticks_

_you get your kicks from confrontation_

_I try to make it past _

_I don't wanna get into it right now_

_can't this family have one day_

_to get away from all the pain- _

Sasuke crept across the barren hall and with each footstep the wooden floor betrayed him with a throbbing whine. The wood felt freezing beneath his bare feet and his toes instantly curled away from the icy touch. His dark eyes shifted carefully around the shadowed area, despite the time he knew his parents would still be awake. The low rumble of voices could be heard from the other room, where he could only assume his parents were. He paused in the hallway, an internal battle racing through his head: should he go talk to them or not?

He trained extra hard that day, much later into the night than planned, but he didn't think his parents would mind; his father was constantly going on about being as skilled as his brother and his mother was always downcast by the lack of harmony in their little family. His mother used to be so kind about the fact Sasuke wasn't a genius like his brother, but things changed slightly with time. Arguments were constantly formed over Sasuke's lack of progress, therefore giving his mother her own reason for him to get stronger: to end the constant quarrels.

'What is the point of them knowing I worked extra hard today?' He asked himself bitterly. 'They probably haven't even noticed I'm late'. His black irises shifted to corner of his eyes and his head bent downward.

Sasuke exhaled as he made up his mind; in the end his pessimistic side took over. He didn't want to deal with them right now; he was so tired, both physically and emotionally. He had no desire to see the disappointment that always lingered in their eyes whenever their gaze fell upon him. Even when they were smiling at him he could still grasp that ever present dissatisfaction lingering inside them, hiding poorly under the thin surface.

He tried to desperately to be as great as his brother was at his age, but he was left in the dust. That dust was choking him, strangling him until he could barely breathe. He didn't know if he could last much longer against the overwhelming emotions swirling around him, inside of him. It was like a constant ache deep inside of him, crushing him from the inside out.

The rumbles of the voices in the other room got louder and Sasuke raised an eyebrow. 'Are they fighting?' He asked himself anxiously. Suddenly a piercing crash shattered through the silent air like a sword slicing through skin. Sasuke's head whipped around to the door, his eyes wide and scared. It sounded as if someone hand thrown a vase in the other room. Shouts now mixed within curses contaminated the air in a chaos that Sasuke was lost in. He had no idea about what was going on or what they were fighting about. He wanted nothing more but to run away, but he stood rooted to the spot.

"MAYBE IF YOU AT LEAST MADE AN EFFORT TO HELP HE WOU--" The shouts of his father could be salvaged through all the noise, only to be cut off by his brother's voice.

"What's the point! So you can use him too?" His brother's normally calm and quiet voice was ridden with fury. "I'm sick of all this crap, I'm leaving!"

A door slammed open and soon Sasuke saw his brother storming down the hall. It was like when you gaze at the sky on a stormy night and see only gloom. The older boy's face was composed, but it was clear that he wasn't as collected as he appeared when he collided headlong into his younger brother. His head jerked downward and he blinked once at the sight of his brother. Sasuke gazed up at him with miserable eyes that mirrored the older boy's pale face. Their appearance was so alike, it was impossible to not recognize them as brothers. There was silence between them, the seconds unused dying with each breath.

"Why are you home so late?" Itachi questioned at last, as if nothing happened.

"Training," Sasuke said flatly. His brother made a strange noise from the bottom of his throat, it sounded like disgust.

"You're all fighting about me," Sasuke went on, whispering hoarsely. "Aren't you?"

"…Yeah" Itachi replied emotionlessly, before adding swiftly. "I'm leaving."

"I see…"

Sasuke knew it was pointless to argue with his brother once he decided to do something. He sighed deeply and stared at the floor in misery, if he was as good as his brother his parents wouldn't have started that fight and Itachi would have stayed longer. It was his fault, everything was.

At first his father was never concerned with Sasuke, hardly acknowledging him or caring. But at least that meant Sasuke wasn't constantly chided about not being as amazing as his brother, at least not all the time. However that luxury didn't last too long because as soon as Itachi left home, his parents were suddenly only too concerned about how far behind Sasuke was compared to his brother. Sasuke was their last hope in having a perfect child; strong, smart, and obedient. For awhile Itachi brought the family honor with his stunning skills, but he was such a rebel he drove his parents insane. Sasuke was different, the opposite; he had average skills for having a blood limit, but he did what he was told.

Itachi must've noticed how depressed Sasuke was because he looking at him with an almost sympathetic expression. Itachi gave him a pat on the head and ruffled his brother's messy hair, before saying in a low rolling voice. "I'll stay longer next time." He removed his hand from Sasuke's head and walked hastily out the door before the younger teen could reply.

Sasuke stared after his brother, that's what he always was doing; staring at his brother back, being unable to catch up. His black eyes became morose again, his head hanging. His brother always said that he'd stay longer, yet it never happened; his visits were shorter each time. Soon he probably wouldn't come at all. Then Sasuke would be stuck alone at his house, with only his parents for company. It was just another one of his brother constant broken promises. Sasuke could swear that he could see his brother destroying each and every promise right before his very eyes.

The pale boy's shoulders slumped; now he would have to deal with his already infuriated father alone. The shadows around him seem to grow as his brother's footsteps faded away and new ones approached. Slowly the black haired boy parted his lips and whispered a simple phrase into the musty air. "Brother, you're a liar."

_-And through the night I see the light_

_shining from the neighbor's windows_

_I dream of life where I'm safe_

_in a home where I am not alone_

_some day I will lay me down _

_on the grass where everything is greener_

_it always seems so good on the other side-_

A blond haired child sat in his bed and his blankets pooled around his knees. A childish hat was drooping off his head, his pajamas a ridiculously vivid blue. The color of his downcast eyes matched that bright shade, but at the moment his mood was anything but bright. No, if you were to give his mood a color it would be a dark sad blue, not a bright one. He rested his head against the cool glass of the window his bed was against; the glass felt icy against his warm cheek He let out a low sigh; his breath steaming up the window, making it difficult to see through.

His house was utterly silent and the emptiness reminding him of how alone he was. No one was in the small home, no one, but him. He was always alone, ever since he could remember. Just as he knew he was hated from the moment he was old enough understand those hatful glares and whispers. He never comprehended exactly why people loathed him so much, it simply had always been that way. At school he had no friends, he was shunned completely. Before a few naïve children would try to make friends with him, only to realize what a mistake that was once when everyone else looked down on them for it. At his age all anyone wanted was acceptance, yet that was one of the things Naruto never got. It was as if he was born into this world to be shunned and then left in solitude.

"If only…" There had to be something better than this empty life.

Naruto's gaze caught sight of the next door neighbor's house, the cheerful glow emitting from it. As if saying, "Come here! There is love and happiness here! Ha! You don't have that idiot!" He smiled bitterly as he imagined a huge advertisement for the house; silently humoring himself. In the commercial someone with a deep jaunty voice would say: "Are you tired of your home? Feel like you might as well get a box to live in to escape you're house? Are you lonely from the silent nights in your hollow life? Then buy 'A better life than yours' it comes with a family and the welcoming house with it! You'll never be lonesome again, guaranteed!" Then a tiny fast voice would hastily mention the price and all the flaws with the 'product'

Naruto let out a derisive snort and rolled over onto his bed so his head was no longer facing the window. The blankets swirled around his small body, but he didn't bother to straighten them. He thought of all the kids constantly complaining about their family, while he lived on without one. What could possibly be bad about having people love you and acknowledge you; to have people to return to each day? Before closing his eyes he muttered into the air.

"Some people don't know how lucky they are."

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - -- - - - - -- - - - - - - -

Kuri: Okay that's all for this chapter! Review or I'll sic Sasuke on you! Right Sasuke?

Sasuke: Hn.

Kuri: Um…That means "Yes I'll slit your thoat in your sleep if you don't review!" Right Sasuke?

Sasu: Hn.

Kuri: Why do I bother asking?

Sasuke: That's what I was wondering.

Kuri:…..Shaddup I control your fate mwahahahahahaha!

Sasu: ...


	2. Chapter2

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto… I own Sasuke! hides from Japanese lawyers who are pulling out their pretty black guns Fine! I don't own anything okay! Oh yeah I don't own the song either. It's done by Smile Empty Soul. Great band, yup.

Warnings: AU. Child abuse. OOC? Hints of shonen-ai so if you don't like it don't read it! Not a happy Sasuke family fic, so if you want them to be happy get lost! Angst! You have been warned so don't flame. -

**It always looked so good**

**  
'**_I'm sick of all the heat  
you can taste the hate in the air  
running through this family, uncomfortably  
it's burning me  
is anybody there  
in your eyes there's nothing to see  
just because your dreams have died  
don't drag me down, I've still got mine'_

Sasuke gazed in a stupor after his brother, wanted to run after him but didn't move. In his state of trance he didn't sense the hostile being creeping up behind him. Harsh hands snatched his wrists from behind and sharply pulled him backwards, causing him to stumble. He winced slightly and by instinct struggled to twist his wrists free. Grinding his teeth, he turned his head up to glare at the aggressor. However Sasuke froze when he saw who had him by the wrists; two sharingan eyes glowered down him.

"D-dad." He stammered nervously, silently cursing himself for how weak that sounded.

"Where did your brother go?" His father asked him, barely contained rage seeping into his voice.

"I don't know…"

Sasuke, who had been staring down at the wooden floor, glanced up at his father to see how he took this. His face looked even madder, as if all his frustration and fury were slowly escaping the dam inside of him. Sasuke felt the grip on his wrists tighten until it was painful; he stared up at his dad with wide eyes. Whenever his father got this livid it never meant anything good for him. Fear clenched at Sasuke's heart, a terror that a child should never have towards their parent.

"Where did he go!" His father demanded again, practically screaming the words.

Sasuke was shaking now, he didn't know where his brother went and even if he did he wouldn't tell. He wouldn't betray his brother like that, but… his father was so terrifying. He had to be brave, he was not a coward, and he could face his own dad. The young Uchiha took a deep breath as if to steady his racing heart.

"I don't know." He repeated, almost desperately.

Seconds after the words left his mouth a sharp pain snapped across his cheek and his head was thrown to one side. He bit his bottom lip to stop himself from crying out. Only the bright red mark on his cheek lamented the pain the hard slap gave him.

"This is your fault." The leader of the Uchiha clan whispered in a deadly voice; words that sent poison into Sasuke's veins.

Sasuke felt his self confidence stumble downwards and in replace a boiling anger advanced. Why does it always have to be my fault? He asked himself heatedly. I always try so hard, but for him it's never good enough. The forbidden indignation overpowered him, driving sensibility away.

"It not my fault you're such a fucking freak!" Sasuke shouted the words droplets of tears forming at the edges of his glazed eyes. "You're the one who is obsessing constantly over power like some-"

His words were cut off as a fist slammed into his stomach; his eyes parted in shock and his knees gave way. Blood rose into his throat as he coughed from the impact. He hugged his throbbing stomach, wincing in pain. He fought to get back on his feet; he could feel his father looking down at him.

"Useless boy," his father muttered, watching his son struggle to compose himself.

Sasuke swallowed, his expression going blank and he forced himself to look the man in the eye. His face fell into shadow as he clenched and unclenched his fists. "You're wrong…" he whispered.

As soon as the words left Sasuke's lips, hot piercing pain erupted in his skull. Hands seized his shoulders in a death grip and slammed him against the wall. He slid to the floor, nothing but a shaking heap at his father's feet. A foot swung out and collided against his side, causing him to yelp. Kicks and punches rained down upon him and he threw his arms over his head in a vain attempt for protection. Suddenly it halted and Sasuke cracked his eyes open to see his father's face right in front of his own. He closed his eyes again. He would not cry.

"Never again will you speak against me." His father whispered dangerously and Sasuke could feel his father's breath against his face. "If I say you're useless, then you are. And if I ask you something, you will answer. Do you understand!"

Sasuke didn't reply, didn't move, and didn't push away from the man that was kneeling by him much to close for comfort. His unresponsiveness was a mighty mistake. Fingers snaked up his pale throat and squeezed ruthlessly, causing his eyes to fly open in panic. Sasuke thrashed madly, twisting under the hold, but the fingers only tightened. Tears welled up in his grey eyes as all the fight was being drained out of him. It was only then that the fingers finally released their hold, leaving him coughing violently.

Tears cascaded down the boy's face, the dam that held them back completely destroyed. Sasuke buried his face in his knees as his shoulders shook with sobs. The pride he once had died, leaving only torment and shame. He was weak, the runt of the clan, unworthy, he didn't even deserve be called a ninja.

"I'm sorry," he gasped between the sobs. "I'm so sorry…"

His father left, saying only one word as he shut the door; "Pathetic."

'neighbor boy runs up to me, his eyes all black and blue  
I say what happened to you boy, he said my daddy flew  
off the hook cos I was playin' too loud  
I guess he couldn't hear the TV  
he said son I'm a teach you a lesson  
and then he ... and then he...'

Naruto strode down the street with a gloomy look contorting his face and his hands shoved into his pockets. Just another day at the academy; a day of being ignored, scolded and hated. Needless to say he wasn't looking forward to his day at ninja school. He was taking the long rout there, who cares if he's late? It was much better than being there.

It was just his luck that'd he'd run into one of the very people he was trying to avoid. Sitting on a bench on the very street he was walking on was Uchiha Sasuke. Naruto contemplated the idea of crossing the street before actually going by Sasuke. He wasn't in the mood to deal with one of his classmates right now.

Personally Naruto didn't have much against Sasuke…yet. He wouldn't call him his friend, but they weren't enemies either. He didn't know much about Sasuke; all he really knew was his clan, that he got good grades, and that he had a genius elder brother. Like himself Sasuke didn't have any friends, it was odd because it seemed like most of the kids were more than ready to accept the Uchiha.

Getting too caught in his own thoughts, Naruto completely forgot about his plan on crossing the street to avoid the other boy. The next thing he knew he was standing right in front of him. Naruto glanced down at him, taking note to the fact that his eyes were closed. He was sleeping. Bruises littered the Uchiha's skin and shadows under his eyes spoke of sleepless nights, overall Sasuke looked rather ill.

Not that I care, Naruto told himself adamantly. But after taking another worried glance down at Sasuke, he instantly knew he was lying to himself. Naruto mentally sighed; he was either too nice for his own good or just too curious.

"Hey are you alive?" he asked loudly, prodding at Sasuke with a finger.

Sasuke's eyes snapped open with a jolt and for a second his whole body seemed to tense up. Then he spotted who it was who had awakened him and he visibly calmed. Naruto couldn't help but be slightly surprised at this reaction.

"What're you doing?" Sasuke asked after a moments pause.

"Seeing if you're okay you moron," Naruto snapped, slightly defensive. "You're the one lying on the bench as if you're dead."

"I'm fine."

"Yeah? That's why you're covered in bruises?"

"I….I fell while I was training."

Naruto didn't reply; his eyes were on the dark bruises around Sasuke's neck. No one got those from falling. Sasuke was so obviously lying, but why would he? What happened?

"Like hell you did," Naruto muttered under his breath.

Luckily Sasuke either didn't hear him or ignored him because he made no comment on it.

"Why aren't you in class?" Sasuke questioned, trying to turn the spotlight off him.

"Why aren't you?"

"…"

Naruto grinned, almost amused at Sasuke's obvious frustration. By trying to avoid the questions he just landed himself with more.

"Let's go to class," Sasuke said at last, avoiding Naruto's eyes.

Sasuke pushed himself off the bench, silently walking in the direction of the school with the other boy close behind. Naruto couldn't help but notice a limp in his walk. Sasuke was struggling with the simple task of walking. What could've happened for him to be in that state and why would he lie about it?

"I'm not buying your 'I fell' story," Naruto said suddenly.

"I did," was the evasive reply.

"That's bull, what really happened?"

A smirk crept across Naruto's face, "Don't worry I won't tell anyone."

To Naruto's surprise Sasuke abruptly turned around, facing him. A somewhat pained expression was on the usually stoic boy's face.

"You promise?" Sasuke asked, almost desperately. "You won't tell?"

Naruto blinked, a little taken aback. Something really bad must've happened to make Sasuke act like this. For the first time throughout the conversation he got truly serious.

"You have bruises all over you, you can't even walk properly." Naruto's vivid blue eyes searched Sasuke's stormy grey. "Who did that to you?"

Sasuke mouth opened and closed as he anxiously tried to think of some lie, something he could possibly say. All he could think of was the truth. He swallowed.

"My father…"

Naruto's eyes widened in shock, of all things he might've expected that wasn't one of them. He couldn't think of anything to say, his brain went momentarily numb. There he was thinking how great, how much better everyone had it when-when-

"Sasuke…" There was nothing he could say; no way could he find any word of comfort or solace. "…I'm sorry."

Sasuke was biting his lip; he wanted to say something, but didn't. He didn't need to. Naruto's arms wrapped around him, feeling as he tensed up in surprise, but then went limp. He didn't know how Sasuke ended up confiding in him or how he ended up holding the other boy in a soft hug. All he knew was the warmth of holding him close and the astounding feeling of comfort that filled him.

'_maybe it's not so good on the other side  
maybe it's not so good on the other side  
but it always seems so good, on the other side  
it always looks so good ... It always seems so good'_


End file.
